Valentine's Day . . .

So . . . tomorrow is Valentine's Day or Tuesday as I like to call it.

Over the last three week I awake each morning to over 10 emails from various online stores attempting to sell me garters, push up bras, thigh highs, nighties, hooker heels, handcuffs and dice.  These emails aren't from slutty stores either but from your mainstream stores. 

Another 10 or so emails tell me, what to get that special someone for Valentine's Day.  It seems all men want is a coffee mugs, ties, shot glasses, tie tacks, a poster of some great stadium and a humidor.  ALL of those are at the top of my husband's list, NOT!  It seems women want jewelry, perfume, trips, nice dinners out, a ring . . . THE RING.  Clearly a more accurate list!

Then there are the, make a special meal, emails.  Betty Crocker, Whole Foods, Kraft Kitchen and Central Market and Market Street have everything you need to make that special someone the meal of their life!  The emails cover everything from salmon, steak, potatoes, champagne with strawberries to something chocolate for dessert.

I am sure there are many women out there taking the advice of emails generated by some guy sitting in a cube, sent during the middle of the night, as if they were a personal message delivered to only them.  As if the emails was the gospel sent from high above.  

These women are hoping for that special gift, the one they are dying to receive, but haven't bothered to tell him about.  They bought that special outfit with the naughty under garments.  They have run all over town to make the perfect meal that will make their man fall in love with them . . . this will do it!

These ladies are waiting with baited breath for him to say those three little words . . . I Love You! 

Secretly . . . or maybe not so secretly they are hoping for a ring from that special guy. 

They are so psyched up.  THIS is going to be the most perfect night ever.  THIS evening is the one.  THIS evening is when it all changes and we live happily every after.  THIS is going to be the most wonderful night, best night of the year. 

cue Going to the Chapel music . . .

Get over yourself . . . all of you!

The build up for Valentine's Day is tremendous.  How can it not be.  Society had told us - This is THE day for him to say I Love You.  This is THE day for him to show he cares.  This is THE day when he will be his nicest and woo you.   This is THE day when he will make you his.

What a load!  Why can't Valentine's Day be everyday?

Now, I am not saying that we should receive presents everyday . . .brought in and delivered on silver trays, covered in rose petals, with the perfect little blue box with a beautiful white satin ribbon . . . delivered by a snotty, stuck-up British type of man, dressed in a tuxedo and white gloves . . . with a violin playing in the background . . . champagne chilling . . . and your man down on one knee, crying, professing his till death do us part love for you.  I am so not saying that.

I am talking about simple things like caring, sharing and loving.

You don't need one freaking day our of 365 days to say TODAY is the day you HAVE to do these things.  You can decide to do those things everyday, anytime of the day, all day!

 

We all know of 1 Corinthians 13:4

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 

Whether you are religious or not this is something to digest.  Something to practice. 

Love isn't a noun . . . it isn't a ring, a dinner, or a perfect location.  It is a feeling and it is best shown through action.

So when you are loving each other be sure to

Be patient.

     Be kind.

          Be caring of each other.

              Be a safe spot for one another.

                  Be forgiving.

                       Be respectful.

Instead of wishing you a Happy Valentine's Day, I will wish you a Tuesday filled with lots of love! And a Wednesday . . . Thursday . . . Friday . . . and so on.

Husbands . . .

Not so long ago I was sitting in a Junior League meeting.  I was on the Nominating Placement committee.  Our committee was charged with the responsibility of identifying new leadership, determining chairmen and putting forth a slate of new officers for the general membership to vote on. 

During one of our marathon weekend, where we went away so we could read all the questionnaires submitted by those seeking leadership and reviewing the interviewed candidates, we took a quick break.  This was day two of our weekend, we had only one more day to get this portion of the leadership done.

We were standing in the kitchen of a friend's lake house.  Everyone refreshing their drinks and getting a snack to push through the next four house when a girlfriend started to complain about having to be away this weekend.

Holiday Whore . . .

Not literally, I don't put out just around the holidays or excessively during the holidays.  I am however, a confessed Holiday Whore.  I love the holidays, any and most all of them.

Clearly you understand loving the big one - Christmas.  The day after Thanksgiving the bins come out.  Bins, not as in 2 but as in 12!  12 bins of holiday, sorry, Christmas joy!  Every nook and cranny gets a little bit of Christmas cheer.  Later in the year for this - here is one of my favorite decorating pics from Christmas 2011.

As soon as Three King's Day is over, January 6, down come Christmas and up goes Valentine's Day. 

In the End . . .

I recently learned a neighbor of mine had passed away.  I suspect he was early to mid 80s.  He was kind, talkative, and very well organized.  He would email our street with anything important, bobcats in the area, unapproved solicitors or holiday parties.  I never had to worry about missing something because I knew Gene was on it.

Gene was a gentleman.  He was a good guy from way back.  In fact he was helping a friend into her car when he sustained the injury that led to his death.  Gene was assisting a friend into her car when she lost her balance, fell on Gene who then fell to the ground.  He hopped back up, I am sure out of pride just like we all do, despite being hurt.  Gene said he was ok and everyone went on about their evening.

It was approximately midnight when I was sitting in my office.  I had the shutters closed but knew when I heard a heavier engine than normal coming down the street something must have happened.  I looked up just in time to see the flashing lights come through the tiny openings that was left in the closed shutters.  I hoped for the best, hoped it was just some fluke and that all was fine.

Bless Your . . .

I grew up in a small Texas town.  Everyone knew everyone else and most likely all their business.  My sister and I went to the same high school as our father, aunts, uncle and their uncle.  My great grandmother was one of the first residents of our small town and lived over by the rail road tracks.  By all accounts our small town was semi rural.

My sister, Julie, and I would ride our bikes, play game outside way after dark and never feared a stranger - after all we knew just about everyone.  Church was every Sunday morning and Wednesday night.  Sleep overs happened quickly and often. We would often come home and find friends playing on the trampoline or basketball in the back yard.  It was a close knit community.

We grew up in a time where you used yes mam's, and no sirs.  Where every adult was called by their last name and where children had chores and helped around the house.  I think fondly of those Sunday afternoons when we would race out of church to go have lunch at my grandparents.  The whole family together for probably one of three Sunday special meals - fried chicken, pot roast or spaghetti!

I Struggle and He Does It With Ease . . .

I recently got a text from another school mom, Pam.  It read "Please call me when you can talk."  Pam doesn't usually communicate this way so an alarm goes off for me!  I sat back to figure out and digest the text.  BTW -Thank Heavens for text messaging.  I texted Pam back that I was at swimming and couldn't talk - then asked if everything was ok.  She didn't answer my question but only replied, "no problem - just call when you can." Alarm # 2.

We leave swimming but I don't call her back.  I want to get my ducks in a row.  Over dinner I ask our oldest son why he thought James' mom would call me.  He is initially vague, but later says there was an verbal altercation and maybe James' feeling were hurt.

The next day I was up at school doing my cafeteria shift.  I ran into James and I asked him, "Hey, I got a text from your mommy, do you know anything about it?"  He said he did and he told me his side of the story.  The stories didn't match - the only similarity was that the boys had been speaking to each other.  I told James, "you know your story is very different" than my son's.  I want to talk to him again before I talk to his mom.

I spoke with my son a second time.  I shared with him James' story.  He said "but Mom, he was annoying me, every time I spoke he just started talking over me with nonsense. I asked him to be quiet and he just kept going and going."  I told my son, I do not like getting called like this.  I do not believe I should get in the middle of you boys and that the boys should be responsible enough to work it out.

He asked what he could do to solve the problem. I suggested calling James and simply telling him - it is clear we do not see eye to eye on what happened but I want to apologize for hurting your feelings. 

Now anyone who knows me well knows I don't apologize easily.  Especially to those I love. 

I am not sure when it began.  Perhaps in childhood? Perhaps at school? Perhaps it is genetic?  I cannot tell you when me saying "I'm Sorry" became so difficult.  It is like pulling teeth with no pain meds and a bulnt instrument.  Maybe I don't say it because I consider it weak? Or is it a win/lose thing? Or because I feel I am wrong so often why bother!

I      Just       Cannot       Do       It!

Seeing my son call, apologize and putting his friendship first over him feeling he was right was awesome to watch.  My son so effortlessly did what I struggle to do.  I love the man he is becoming.

Happy Pinning!